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September 27, 2005

Deviant Taco Porn

Tacoporn

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» Hump Day a Lump a Dump Day from green gabbro
It's Wednesday, and I'm thinking about kabocha squash and kugel. (The San Francisco Chronicle's food section is by no means equal to the L.A. Times', but since I get the Chron in paper form for optimal breakfast-squinting-at, it'll have to do.) And wh... [Read More]

Comments

Holy guacamole! At least the other photo didn't bring thoughts of infibulated vaginas to my mind.

ick

poor, misguided taco

Thanks, Sam! After reading the words "infibulated vaginas", I went blind! Thanks a bunch!

Brings a whole new meaning to food porn.

You need a show on the food network: Twisty's Easy Meals for Patriarchy Blamers and Fetishists.

I blame the burritoarchy.

Twisty-

I'd sleep with Bob Novak if it would get me your brain.
Fa Shizzle.

Excuse me, Twisty? I work in a serious, dour, world-saving office, and laughing my fool head off is frowned upon by my co-workers.

This seems like the appropriate place to mention that a TravelSmart catalog was foisted upon me today by my well-intentioned in-laws.

Har-dee-damn-har.

Naughty!

Oh God, I'm scarred for life. I've barely gotten over the other whatever-that-was. Poor taco. Poor, poor taco.

Twisty, I wish I had an award to confer on you on the level of Medal of Freedom for these fashion posts alone. It's like I died and went to heaven. I just can't believe I walk around so unserious a world when this is happening all around us.

aaaaah!! Too funny!! ow! ow! ow!!

Oh holy shit! That is the best thing I've seen in days, and it totally took my mind off of the big, fucktard-induced gouge I found in the side of my Buick LeSabre this afternoon. Thank you, thank you.

I know what I'm serving at my next social gathering!

Not the LeSabre! Can you cover the gouge up with a ribbon magnet?

It will take a very large ribbon, I'm afraid. Or perhaps a fleet of very small, obnoxious ones.

I was thinking of covering it with all the stickers that I get when I donate to Planned Parenthood and the ACLU, but I don't want to make the poor thing more of a target than she already is.

YESH!!! That is fabulous!

But it does not please me to report that I've seen women do similar things, the least interesting of which is a single ring going through both labia. I'm pretty sure that's just called a chastity piercing. I believe the basic structure of the more disturbing one is called a ladder piercing. You can just have two sets of rings going up your labia . . . . but this one women took out the rings & wove in a metal COIL. She fucking put a coil through the holes in her labia, thus infibulating herself. And then there was another picture where she used the coil as a vase . . . . like, put a flower in the coil . . . . that was keeping her twat shut. BLAH! It really freaked me out & I'm not easily freaked out.

Also my free extreme membership [for genitals & stuff] at bmezine expired, so I can't go back and find the names and pictures to make sure I'm calling this shit right :-(

Ditto to Sam! the word "infibulated" on its own freaks me out sufficiently, but the idea of infibulated vaginas is just horrifying..
and, D.E.I.X.I.S., no photos necessary.. the description alone is too vivid as it is.
What's with extreme mutilation, anyways?
I find it disturbing. Not just that it shocks, but also that it seems to indicate a deep self-hatred.

you could cover up the gouge on the le sabre with some of these:
http://www.fuckthiswebsite.com/
(there is a free download--i like the idea of 'editorializing' signs...)
btw-have you heard about the freeway blogger?
http://www.freewayblogger.com/
i think there would be some patriarchy-blaming applications...

Taco - You just had to do it didn't ya?

I'm enjoying your fantastic series about fashion, it's both encouraging and depressing at the same time. Horray! We've identified the problem, but boo! there's little we can do to rectify it.

You know what's really offensive about this? The wasted cheese that gets on the ribbon. I mean, the way synthetics hold onto grease, you know you're not going to be able to retrieve every little molecule of taco-y goodness from that fabric no matter how hard you suck on it.

Tragic.

Sara, this taco's not for eatin'. It's for dominatin'!

that is some hot shit.

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About


  • I Blame The Patriarchy is a function of Twisty Faster, a gentleman farmer and spinster aunt eating dinner in Austin, Texas.

  • Email Twisty: taco at iblamethepatriarchy dot com

  • I Blame The Patriarchy is intended primarily for advanced patriarchy-blamers. It is not a feminist primer. See Patriarchy-Blaming The Twisty Way for more information.
  • More About Twisty

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Email Of The Week

  • "Of course you would blame Patriarchy for all your ill's and problems. It is easier to blame males than take resposibility for you being a screw-up."